July 24th, 2011
1:12 AM approx.
Here we go again. I managed to find a small bit of light from a streetlamp a few feet away from me. I don't really know where I can go to vent my thoughts anymore. Anyone that would care to listen to me now are dead. Lucky for me I can't kill the blades of grass. Not all of them, at least. I carry a few of you in my pocket. My only friends.
A man is lying beside me now. He is cold, still, and soaked in his own blood. I sit here beside him in a dark alley that hides me from the main road. I don't know if I was the one that killed him; I really don't know much of anything that I do anymore. I fell asleep again, right here in this alley. I woke up and he was next to me, exactly the way that he is now. I had a shard of pointed glass in my hand when I opened my eyes.
I used to work for a little local grocery store on the outskirts of this town. It wasn't much of a paycheck, but I didn't mind the area and I needed a job to get some money on the side. I was attending college back then and living with my parents. Another girl worked there at the store with me; Anna. She was an extremely quiet, awkward woman that was my age and ended up going to the same college I did. When there was nothing else to do, I would try to start conversations with her. It wasn't easy at first, but eventually she warmed up to me. It was nice having a friend at work. Made the day go by faster.
Then we started talking about religion. I remember that she got all quiet when we stumbled upon the topic on a slow afternoon. I jokingly prodded her for answers. She told me she was Wiccan. Even as I write this, I still feel that urge to feel sarcastic and poke fun at her. She didn't like that much, I remember. She challenged me to come with her somewhere, so she could show me the kind of magical things she could do. I told her fine, whatever, she could show me her weird mojo after work if she wanted. Biggest mistake of my goddamn life.
I can still hear them trying to find me. It's like every time I close my eyes to rest, footsteps echo in my ears. I hear them talking amongst the movement, my name is always mentioned. I hear the scrapes of their boots just feet from me, combined with the clicks of their nails. Are they really there, or is it the thing trying to break me faster? There's no reason to, I already know that it is winning. A man wouldn't be lying dead beside me if that weren't true.
I don't know how much longer I can write like this. I will try to keep documenting the last few days of my life as best I can. I know it's stupid; talking to nobody but the paper I write on. Maybe the whole ordeal has made me superstitious or something. Like, if I stop doing what I'm doing, then it knows that it has won and will instantly take over. I also am afraid to talk about it too much, because I think it is watching through my eyes. I will leave my thooOOOOOOOOOOO
O
O
N
NN
n
Nn
N-
NO NO NO NO
No No N No NO NO
No comments:
Post a Comment